The Adventures of Marik and Bakura: A Trip To Hogwarts
by bakuratrash
Summary: This is a comedy/drama/subtle parody about Yugioh and Harry Potter
1. Chapter 1

**[Hello my friends, my brother has asked me to publish this fic for him since he does not think he will be able to get a fanbase, so I am here to support him. This is going to be a… parody-type story that I honestly am looking forward to him finishing lmao! Please take this lightly and laugh along with us** **Many thanks, Bakuratrash]**

 **Welcome to my Thiefshipping and Harry Potter crossover fanfiction. Forgive me if I have slipped on any important Harry Potter facts or things may seem askew for those of you who are familiar with the story. I am merely molding the two worlds as I see fit within my own imaginative thoughts. Just enjoy the ride.**

 **Chapter 1**

I'm dreading to tell him. Just dreading to see his face. That look of disappointment when something absolutely isn't fair and isn't going to go your way. No matter how hard you try, how deeply you felt you deserved it, how incredibly planned and practiced nor studied for the occasion, we must accept who we are oftentimes comes about beyond our control.

And I, Bakura, am dreading it. I can see that blank look he always gives me. The look of complete emptiness yet lost in thought as if his soul had been overcome by his past shadows and demons. Devoured and then suddenly pulled back into very reality. Like a gust of wind jumped inside of you and traded your very breathe for a lifetime of spiteful commentary. That is why speaking to him had always been slightly transparent in a way. Like we were standing on the opposite side of French doors peering in on a humid summer day (me sipping the glorious elements of a fruitful sangria of course). The other had just as much fun as the one looking in, so it seemed safe to always be peeking in, mocking each other sarcastically through this glorified glass that we created for ourselves. It might be interesting to see which one of us imagined ourselves on the outside of that glass. To me, I am on the outside which is what makes this so completely ironic.

Ultimately the emotions, the drama, the tears, and then the prolonged series of anger and inevitable revenge; using anybody, anything, any place to achieve that goal. If only he could put that energy into something useful. I always thought he would make an amazing politician. If only he possessed the people skills. If only he could understand that this is not something I wanted but is now something I must do. The comments will come. Oh they will come and be fierce like a fire that knows no limits or know no weakness. A fire that wants to spread and destroy everything in its path until there is nothing. I don't want that but every way I can imagine there is no solution that does not involve destruction.

I sighed and then looked up. The sun was beginning to set. Such beauty but not even close to the sunsets we witnessed together. The light was so bright and reflected off the water and what seemed to be symmetrical works of art. Just slightly adrift above the water I could what looked to be the shadows of distant swans drifting further away from my vision but nevertheless still together. Above them the beautiful horizon crystalizing, and above that the mountain peeks intimidated all who dared lay eyes on its handsome boundries. So sharp, so wide. I imagined climbing those beastly summits and imagined how cold it might feel. A chill ran down my spine and then I thought about how my feet ached from the tremendous hill I climbed. I know Marik would never find me here and even if he did he'd refuse to climb it due to laziness . The dirt latched onto my sneakers dry and lifeless and just as I noticed the sun had reached its highest point. The brightest orange I had ever seen in my entire life and yet I was alone but felt like the luckiest man in the world. It appeared to be king. A king to all it touched which was the entire world. What great power but as its reign was now present it also must end for a great king must always die. It wasn't until then that I finally remembered why I walked all this way and conquered this very elevation. I still had some time before the day closed. Its been three days. Three days of inventing conversations that never actually happened. Three days of procrastinating the inevitable blow up. I can just hear Marik now, "You didn't even try but you didn't even try". Just then I looked. The sun's reign had drooped over the trees creating a great shadow beyond everything beneath me. The swans had vanished and the horizon decrystalized. Then a clear voice cut through the sharper rocks just beneath me.

"What are you doing"

I heard it but ignored it. An owl echoed in the distance.

 _Who-Who-WhoWho_

It was marvelous. I could see its wingspan spread wide into the eyes of the drooping sun. The king was falling slowly and soon would end; until tomorrow. Just then I heard the voice again. This time it screamed my name.

"BAKURA"

Marik had found me. Though I still wasn't worried. A touch of confidence had gathered inside of me and I was feeling brave. Could it now be my turn to rule over all the light touches. I pondered with the greatest grin that quickly vanished knowing I'd have to eventually now climb down in the pitch-black night sky with a lack of stars lighting my very way. I answered Marik cunningly,

"Come up here and see for yourself"

I knew he never would but entertained putting the physical message into Marik's thoughts. He swiftly answered,

"By the time I get myself up there it will be morning and my eggs won't be ready."

I laughed at this. So many things. Entertained that Marik thinks he can climb this very beast of a landscape and chuckling at the notion that I'm the one that makes the eggs each morning. Alas I decided to come down and to my surprise only stumbling three times. We walked home cheerfully. We shared stories like each night. I wanted to cherish this companionship. It could very well be one of the last we both have of each other. Memories for two. At last when we got home I took my last breath and began to tell him. And at this hour there was no going back. I grasped the letter that was tucked into my back jeans pocket, gulped, and looked down at my shoes. The dry lifeless dirt had withered off on the walk home. Suddenly I began,

"Marik I have some news your not going to like"

He began staring at me with the most focus I've ever seen from him. His eyes wide like a deer being cornered by a hunter. I realized I was that hunter and that this would most definitely break his very soul. I opened the letter and began to read aloud:

 _Dear Mr. Bakura,_

 _We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term begins September 1_ _st_ _. We await your owl no later than July 31_ _st_ _._

 _Yours Sincerely,_

 _Minerva McGonagall_

 _ **Deputy Headmistress**_

The silence was unbearable. It was only really a few seconds but then we had lost all eye contact. He turned completely and I could feel my saliva drying up so quickly leaving a foul taste in my mouth. The confrontation I was dreading for three days was here. To my surprise he calmly responded,

"But you didn't even try"

I began to respond and was interrupted.

"I applied so many months ago there must be some kind of mistake."

I tried to respond again to find that I was yet again interrupted this time with much yelling.

"You don't even care how the bloody hell do you get accepted to bloody Hogwarts without even trying. It doesn't make any sense!"

This time I paused to let him finish. There was another uncomfortable two seconds of awkward silence until Marik wailed,

"DUMBLE-WHORE

This was the beginning of the ultimate destruction of all muggle society as we knew it. This time I responded quickly and confidently,

"I don't think it's a school that normally is applied to but more so is a selection based on witchery and wizardry potential. Like genetics or something of that sort."

I stopped to think inside my head what I had just said. Had I been cruel? It seemed prideful almost gloating in my own narcissism. I was proud of this new part of me that I had never imagined would come. Me a wizard and Marik a muggle. Above all odds this was the day that I had come on top. Why was I so ashamed of this. Soon I will be even more powerful than Marik could ever imagine.

"Rubbish!"

Marik replied with a harsh half full glass of wine thrown at me that he apparently found the time to pour while I was thinking possibly for longer than I even thought

Marik squeeled,

"Genetics? Your hair is all white and you've barely reached your late 20's! Dumbledore is doing this on purpose you see. I warned him of the consequences of not admitting me! Bakura your being used. You're a pawn in all of this and its not fair. You can't go to Hogwarts you see. We have to take down Dumbledore. Together we will overtake him. We will overtake Hogwarts. The castle is ours! Bakuraaaaa!"

I cleared my throat at the utter nonsense I was hearing,

"Your thoughts of denial are frightening Marik. I don't want this to hurt our friendship and come between us but nevertheless I don't think blackmailing Hogwarts can actually work or the more can actually come with any positive feedback."

"I will be a wizard" screeched Marik as he began sobbing through a rollercoaster-esque pool of emotions.

I couldn't bear it anymore. I grabbed Marik and held him close. We hugged and I whispered in his ear.

"I don't know why. All that I do know is that I must now embark upon this journey without you for the first time in a long time."

Marik focused on me with those eyes again. I could feel his heartbeat against my chest racing with an unbeatable pulse. His tears were being held back. We sat by the warmth of the fire for a while. We were confident enough to sleep. Comforted by a twofold of the long sofa and the crackling sounds of the warm fire that had so happened to start on its own. We hadn't used that fireplace in years. I could sense a great magical influence within me now. A power I had never felt before growing within my very veins getting stronger by the very minute. My deep emotions for sure started that fire but when I awoke the fire was gone and so was Marik. I felt lonely. I don't know if he was ever coming back. All I knew was that I had to leave soon. Unknowingly, my journey had already begun. Even more importantly I grew concerned more with how I reacted the previous night. This pride I was never accustomed to. A side of me that was unleashed and was unknowingly held captive, prisoner within my very heart had been let go. It is now free within me and it deeply frightened me. Regardless it was late and I must leave. Yet again onto the next task of this long journey seamlessly so and unexpectedly without Marik by my side.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

I left that morning like any other. The only difference was that this time it was unclear if I would ever return. I was not particularly emotional about it that is until I could no longer block it out of my mind anymore. I remembered our little cottage deep in the woods that we had built together. We stumbled upon it one afternoon by accident. We scuffled through the abandoned remains of the previous owner. To our surprise there was little to be found. It didn't need much work just a little bit of light and warm bodies to fill the vacant space. We had built our own furniture, carved it out of the trees of our liking. Cabinets for keeping, bedframes for sleeping, furniture for the casual lounging on a cold winters day as we snuggled in our cozy habitat that we created for ourselves. The only major change we made was the addition of a fireplace. That same fireplace was strangely used only twice. Once on the day of its existence and again on its last. Yes, this was a home we had created for ourselves. Doors with double locking mechanisms painted in hunter green with a hinge that only squeaked when opening. A path with a lowered stairwell made completely out of stone that led to a nearby lake where we could watch the ducks fish for a midday catch. A garden that I had made planting carrots, spinach, and corn. Corn that satisfied our appetites and grew even taller than I. And beyond the corn was about a mile of prairie which led you to a trail of peach trees that greeted a thirsty mouth on any occasion. Even further yonder a pumpkin patch that birthed the roundest and the most orange one could ever lay their eyes on. I remembered all of it. Thinking about it then it was our home but now it seemed more like a salvation that I had foolishly left behind.

Some miles away past the peach trees and pumpkin patch, I came to realize I had no idea where Hogwarts was. I had stupidly assumed that Marik would have somehow accompanied me in some sort of obligatory yet unsympathetic manner. He had of course been upset with me before but never to the point of complete separation from me. This uncharacteristic behavior of Marik started to make me feel more suspicious. The more I walked, the more I thought, the more I thought, the more I questioned in a cycle of uncomfortable incomplete thoughts. I accomplished this with the utter loneliness I had felt trekking through the wilderness. I was in complete harmony with my movements and with nature itself. Complete solitude. Just me and the trees. Various flowers of magenta, red so bright you were blinded, and yellow so thickly textured that if you looked hard enough at their amber-like surfaces you would easily be lost in a trance confused for who knows how long. The grass penetrated the various wildlife that surrounded it. Moving swiftly perpendicular to the winds brisk current. Bending further and further till it at last the resistance would at last fail. Without a doubt this place was beautiful. I sincerely felt that Marik would not simply abandon me without incident. I thought in a cloudy mind and hungry stomach which was both problematic and counterintuitive. I for one would never abandon Marik in this way and so why would he? This for one was much too quiet for him to simply slip out while being so angry the night before. Could something have happened last night while I was sleeping? All these could be possibilities but not at all possible without a leap of significant fate. A fate that I no longer had in even myself. It seemed all so illogical and I doubted it all. Alas, no signs of a struggle back in the cottage was evidence enough for me to keep moving.

I thought about turning back or even running back but I was much too deep to even consider returning without risking getting lost. I had to begin focusing better on surviving as I got deeper into the forest. The wildlife truly began to reveal itself and the true essence of nature had overcome me. Indeed this was the deepest part of the forest I had ever traveled to. Every so often Marik and I witnessed badgers and even mountain lions a few times. Last summer a bear assumingly made its way into our backyard picnic area and utterly destroyed much of it as well as ate a majority of our tuna fish sandwiches (though it did not care much for the mayonnaise based contents). It clawed, destroyed, slobbered, and ate pretty much everything it laid its eyes on. Leaving behind its mark and by mark I mean massive footprints and the foul stench of bear urine that left an odor so obtrusive that ones sinuses began reacting horribly. Leaking histamine from the eyes, ears, and nose leaving behind only a strong burning sensation. Obviously cleaning up was a significant challenge and of course Marik refused to take part in any of it.

The sun had reached its highest point in the midday sky and with it accompanied a heat so exhausting that it left you drenched in a cool uncomfortable sweat. Even surrounded by trees in the environment I was in the heat intimidated my body. Sweat leaked from my long white hair and my pale skin was screaming. My tight jeans soaked, and my shirt was bathed in the same salty substance that made me feel all so uncomfortably bitter. For sure I didn't anticipate the sun being so tedious. I had to stop myself.

 _Damnit why didn't you pack sunscreen you oblivious idiot!_

I took cover underneath the biggest tree I could find and sat down. I reached into my knapsack and relieved my thirst. Oh the freshness of sweet water! I could feel the cool wetness on my tongue and feel the jubilation throughout. Being upset as I was towards Marik shadowed my biological needs more than I had wanted to admit. I don't know how far I walked but it must have been a long way. Maybe 10 miles who knows how deep this forest dwells?

Dehydration is no joking matter but neither is hunger; which I was and which I also relieved by gobbling two of the four dumplings I packed. Yum! Thirst and hunger no matter which comes first (or both assumingly at once) the dreadful one to me would have to be hunger. To die of hunger would be a slow and miserable death that is underserving of many people. There are those who die of thirst and if I was told correctly die quickly. Hunger is more of a process. Hunger penetrates the survivors instincts. If one is hungry enough they can really get to know their true self. What to eat. Anything. What to drink. Water, rain, fluids, but never urine no matter how attractive. Hunger lasts. Hunger is what separates the people from the animals and in this place at this very moment I was no longer human. I was dominately animal. Today I'm thankful for packing water and food.

I laid in the shade a bit more and closed my eyes. I must have dozed off because it felt much cooler than before and the sun had dimmed a bit (though it was hard to tell by the massive trees surrounding me but I assumed it was mid afternoon). I was awoken by the sounds of footsteps. Harsh footsteps that could only be made by large feet. My pulse began to race and I felt very nervous. I quickly got up and hid behind the tree. The footsteps were drawing nearer and I could hear breathing. Loud breathing in and out inhaling and exhailing in a disgusting manner. For what kind of beast could this be I thought to myself! I peaked from behind the tree and to my surprise there revealed to be what may be the largest and ugliest man I had ever seen. In short, hair. Hair, from the top of his head to his beard that ended at his fat massive chest that stuck out for miles. His boots were heavy and he wore a withered brown jacket despite the horrible heat that was overtaking my very senses. One could only imagine the stink. He had to have stood over eight feet tall and was even more so wider. Yet, his raised cheek bones peeked just so above his beard that communicated a kind gentle man. The scariest thing about him was the massive crossbow hunched across his shoulder and the line of wild animals attached over the other. Whatever he was hunting I had never seen before in my life and I began to wonder if he was even a man If it wasn't for the crossbow I would have ran but my smartest bet was to remain still and hidden. Just then I had lost my footing and clumsily broke a weak branch with my foot. The sound echoed, the man was startled, he quickly turned around and before I knew it I was in the crosshairs of a large crossbow. The man screamed at me,"Who goes there!"

I stayed down. I was as vulnerable as those dead animals that now lay some feet across from me on a line next to the man's ginormous feet that he had thrown to the ground to confront me.

I responded slowly, "I mean you no harm just passing by I don't want any trouble"

The man glared at me with his beady cold black eyes like he was trying to read my entire life up to that point. He got closer and closer by little effort. His heavy strides effortlessly luring me in. Until he spoke again, "I know you've been following me I could smell you miles away".

Clearly the presumed man was delusional. Unfortunately I had no time from insults by the likes of him. I has lost, hot, and sweaty.

"Are you mad? Are you seriously insinuating that you smelled me miles away? Me? look at you wearing an entire furniture set, an ugly one at that in this hundred degree heat and that filthy unkempt beard dripping all over the place looks like an outdated centerpiece. Not even a bird would use that filthy hair as a nest. Your feet disgusting covered in mud and the reek of dead animal all over you. Pfft! And, you smell me?"

I couldn't believe the words I spoke. I surely just insulted a huge thing with a crossbow pointed at me with a context that he never misses anything due to his impressive hunted game. His insulted face grew smaller. Yet, he responded in utter confusion and we exchanged a dialogue that left at least some answers. The big brute responded swiftly,

"Who are you? What's your business here if you haven't been following me anyway"

"My name is Marik Ishtar and I'm on a journey"

"And to where that might be"

"What even are you anyways why are you so huge"

"Answer my question first boy"

"Please don't eat me"

"Eat you why would I want to eat a pasty boy who already has lost all the color in his hair there is nothing appetizing about that. Where are you headed. I've known these woods for many years and don't run into people often and when I do there is usually trouble. Big trouble"

"I beg your pardon?"

At this point I hesitated. The crossbow glaring at me and the sharp tip of the bolt already felt excruciatingly painful. So silver and aerodynamic. So willing. I had no choice.

"I'm looking for Hogwarts, the school of witchcraft and wizardry."

If the large man didn't look confused then by now he looked completely disoriented. His nose crinkled dramatically. His hair dripping with an unevenness of sweat dripping from the very ends and landing on his crossbow accordingly.

"If its Hogwarts you say you're a longways away."

It was at this very moment that me and him shared a look of content. He eventually lowered his crossbow to my relief. Finally my nerves and bones released their tension and I could breathe freely again. Accordingly I obviously didn't know where I was and the man believed me. My sense of navigation was always weak and Marik was the known navigator having had a stint with his Pirate days and all. A time that to this day I have repressed sadly. For all I know I just picked a direction (the front door) and started walking.

"Do you know the way um…you large person"

"The name is Hagrid, Rubeus Hagrid and if you weren't wondering already I am a half-giant what brings you to travel to Hogwarts Marik"

 _I thought to myself that he surely has crossed the line. Gone too far this time! Almost gotten us burned by the sun, starved, and dehydrated all in the same day. But now that his guard was down I could manipulate the situation for the best of me._

 _"_ _I have a meeting with Dumbledore, headmaster of Hogwarts"_

Whatever I said the giant believed me and we even took to traveling together. He talked to me as an equal and apologized profusely for almost taking off my head with his bow. Hagrid went on and on about the forest. Something about how it was "Forbidden" or something. I laughed to myself knowing I had lived within its boundaries all this time without much incident.

 _I soon later learned he was gamekeeper and keeper of the keys at Hogwarts. This of course meant nothing to me other than the fact that I wanted those keys. I had to give the giant credit, he did know where Hogwarts was and did know the forest but I would soon need to be rid of him sooner rather than later but first I needed much more information from him. In the end it was useful that we had run into him. For now we walked._


End file.
